The wedding part 26

 The therapy session got renewed for the next week so they could discuss possible solutions to her problem. The only thing the Dr. mentioned was that she was stressed from all her daily life as the events went on so far.

Leo called her right after and requested for a meeting. They met at her place and he asked her how she was doing...

-I haven't seen you in a while, he said sweetly. 

- Yeah, work got busy, she lied easily. Plus, I don't sleep very well. I must be very stressed with all what happens around me.

-What is it baby? Do you wanna talk to me?

They talked about how stressed she feels with this new situation and asked for some time. 

- To think it over and relax a little. 

- This means I won't be seeing you for some time? he whimpered gently.

- That's about right...

They parted their ways and that evening they did not have sex at all. They only kissed like it was their last time.

Jessica went to work the next day and then visited the library. She wanted to remember how things started more than two and a half years back. She roamed around and picked a book to read and spend some hours with her face deep down in the book.

They did not meet for a while. Even at the gym their schedules were different. Some occasional "I 'm thinking of you" were received by Jessica, but she was adamant in her choice of some free-of-Leo time. And that's how the near days passed.

The wedding part 25

They woke up and had a coffee, lightly talking about other people... Jessica looked up for a therapist the same evening and booked an appointment online for right the next day, for intake. 

She appeared in the psychologist's office dressed casually, where she was greeted by the secretary:

- Please, Dr Marietta is in her office waiting for you! she smiled at Jessica.

She entered and after introducing themselves she sat down.

- My name is Dr Marietta Morisson and I am a clinical psychologist. You can call me Marietta. I would like to ask if it is ok with you if i take some notes, while we converse? she asked chirply. 

- Sure, not a problem, replied Jessica on the same note.

- So, Jessica, what brings you here today? 

- Ehm, I m not so sure how to interpret it, and I am not even sure I am in the right place...she hesitated.

- Let's see, I don t want you to interpret anything, I would just like you to tell me if you have any worries lately, she asked in a kind tone.

- Oh yeah, I do have a bunch of them to be honest, but it s this recurring nightmare that brought me here today if I may be open.

- Oh yes of course you can and I want you to, she smiled. Tell me more about this nightmare...

- Yes, sure. You see the matter is a little too... delicate let's say. 

- Anything you say in this room is strictly confidential. It stays in this room.

Jessica exhaled a deep breath.

- Well, I have a nightmare where the press is chasing me. She cleared her throat. I have a secret relationship with someone famous and there is a problem...

- What kind of problem, the Dr. enquired. 

- He is married and getting a divorce right now. But his wife also cheated on him! she tried to cover it up quickly as if she could bury the shame. 

- For how long have you been seeing the nightmare?

- About few days now, but it is exhausting, I cannot function properly anymore. I cannot sleep properly.

- Tell me more about this relationship. 

- He has two kids... Recently we found out about the wife's infidelity. The divorce is in progress anyway now...

- So, if I hear you correctly, this man has been seeing you for quite some time now?

- Yes, it's been two and a half years years now that we are hiding...

- And how do you feel about it? she enquired while taking notes.

- I don't like it that much. 

Silence in the air. Jessica continued:

- I was seeing someone before and even earlier I was married and things with him now got out of hand and I had the press asking me questions and I m not good with the fame... you know...

- I am a little confused. Shall we take it from the beginning?

Then Jessica proceeded to explain how they met in a library, went on harmless dates for some time till feelings developed and they had sex and proceeded to enter a secret relationship on and off with him. She told her about the secret code and all the details she could fit in about 30 minutes. She mentioned William and her feelings for him that were mediocre...the move... the gifts and so much more. 

Song of the mood

The original i wanted to post is not available on youtube unfortunately, so I found the second relevant song of this period!
(original : Mente Fuerte. ObieDaz - Pou pas)

 

The definition of intelligence

Intelligence, or "νοημοσύνη" (noimosíni) in Greek, is a complex and multifaceted ability that involves various aspects of mental capacity. It's like having a toolbox in your mind with different tools for solving problems, learning, adapting to new situations, and making good decisions.

Intelligence includes skills such as logical reasoning, problem-solving, critical thinking, creativity, memory, and the ability to learn from experience. It also involves the capacity to adapt to different environments and situations effectively. Intelligence is not just about knowing facts; it's about using knowledge and skills to navigate the world and achieve goals.

It's important to remember that there are different theories and definitions of intelligence, and it can manifest in various ways in different individuals. Some people excel in mathematical or linguistic intelligence, while others may have strong interpersonal or spatial intelligence. Intelligence is a diverse and valuable aspect of human capability.

Source: Chatgpt recovered on 19/09/2023

Να θυμηθούμε τα παλιά

Την κοίταξε στα μάτια. Έλιωσε, σε μια στιγμή...

Τσαφ.

Ανομολόγητα

 

04-02-2012

 

Η μετριοπάθειά μου κατακλύζει το είναι, τις στιγμές που η αυτοπεποίθησή μου θα έπρεπε να ρίχνει το ηθικό των γύρω μου. Αγαπάω κάθε κύτταρο μου τόσο πολύ που φοβάμαι πως δε θα μου είναι αρκετή η αγάπη ενός συντρόφου. κανείς δε θα με κατακτήσει στο 100%, γιατί είμαι τόσο ιδιαίτερη που ακόμα κι εγώ με δυσκολεύω σαν ύπαρξη. είμαι περίεργη, παράξενη, μοναδική και θέλω να αναπτυχθώ ακόμα πιο πολύ. μ αρέσει να ξεχωρίζω γιατί γεννήθηκα μ αυτό το στίγμα. άστρο το λένε; Άλλοι το λένε βλακεία. μα ποιος νοιάζεται; Ίσως αν μου κρεμάσω την ταμπέλα «εγωίστρια», να πάψω να χω τύψεις για τις παράλογες πράξεις μου. έχω δυσκολία στη διαχείριση καταστάσεων, γιατί ποτέ δεν ανέλαβα το ρίσκο της πρωτοβουλίας. κι αν έφερα εις πέρας κανα δυο πραγματάκια ήταν ανάγκη συνθηκών. Ω, φως των ματιών μου. Οι παραδοχές μου ξεπερνάνε και τα όρια της μαλάκυνσης μερικών ατόμων. Κι η μοναξιά; Εκεί παλεύεις και χάνεσαι. Κι ενίοτε ξαναγυρνάς. Άλλοτε την αποζητάς και γίνεται λιμάνι πόθων. Σ ένα γλυκό τετ- α- τετ όπου όλα είναι επιτρεπτά υπό τη δικαιολογία της παραφροσύνης. και να το ταμπελάκι που κρεμιέται. μα σπάσε πια τις αλυσίδες! Για το γαμώ το της ελευθερίας...

Συνεχώς ο εαυτός μου με τρομάζει κι ανακαλύπτω νέα όρια. Μέχρι που η τρέλα του νου να συμπέσει με την κοινή τρέλα και να με κλείσουν σ ένα δωμάτιο. Κι εκεί θα χω την ευκαιρία να φιλοσοφήσω σε βάθος, έννοιες που ποτέ δε θα αγγίξω. Αγάπη, μίσος, φόβος, αιωνιότητα και κάθε τι στην υπέρτατη μορφή του. Κι αναρωτιέμαι... να σωθώ ή να παλέψω μ ολιγοστές δυνάμεις; Η σκέψη της ήττας με νικά πριν καν ξεκινήσω τη μάχη. Κι ας ξέρω πως δε θα χάσω τον πόλεμο...

 

 

 

 

05-02-2012

 

Κουράστηκα, σιχάθηκα την ίδια μονότονη ζωή. Μα αν τα τινάξω όλα στον αέρα θα βάλω μπουρλότο και σε ζωές άλλων και θα κατηγορηθώ για υποκρισία και αστάθεια χαρακτήρα. πόσο χαλιέμαι να με ξέρουν οι άλλοι καλύτερα από μένα! Αναρωτιέμαι πια τι δείχνω και τι κρατάω για μένα. Όλα γύρω μου φαντάζουν ψεύτικα, στιγμές που το μυαλό μου παίρνει στροφές ανάποδες. Έχω μια δύναμη κρυφή. Μέσα μου, που όλα θέλει να τα κατασπαράξει, Να φτιάξω τη ζωή μου θέλω μόνο, απαγορεύονται όμως οι ενέργειές. Τα λάθη μου σίγουρα τα πληρώνω κι αναρωτιέμαι ως πότε θα είναι η αποπληρωμή. Έχω έντονα μέσα μου ένα μόνιμο πισωγύρισμα, μόνο που πλέον έχει αρχίσει να με κατανικά. Δεν έχουν σημασία για κανέναν τα λόγια και οι σκέψεις μου κι όλοι περνούν. Έρχονται και πάνε. Καθείς στο δικό του δρόμο, στο μονοπάτι που διαλέγει. εγώ μονάχα τρέμω μήπως στα μονοπάτια που διαλέγω μείνω μόνη και αναγκαστώ ν αντιμετωπίςω τον μεγαλύτερο μου εχθρό: τον εαυτό μου! Όπως κάνω τώρα σε μια υπόγεια μάχη. Είναι βλέπεις, πολύ σκληρός ανταγωνιστής, μα πάνω από όλα κριτής. Με κρίνει ανελέητα. Μα πως μπορεί, αφού εγώ πράττω τις δικές του προσταγές; Δικά του είναι τα λάθη μιας και υποτάσσομαι τυφλά...

 

 

Καταλαβαίνω με τον καιρό πως δεν έχει σημασία τι περνάω μα ποιοι είναι δίπλα μου. Ανησυχία με πιάνει γι αυτό, γιατί φαντάζομαι τι με περιμένει. Μα δεν ξερω ποιοι θα απαλύνουν τον πόνο μου εις μέλλοντες καιρούς. Αφήνοντάς με να τον μοιραστώ μαζί τους. «απραγία», η λέξη που με χαρακτηρίζει στο τώρα. Είναι λέξη δυνατή κι ας μοιάζει τόσο κουτή. Είναι το αντίθετο της ενέργειας τρόπο τινά κι όλοι νιώθουμε τη δύναμή της ακόμα κι όταν την προφέρουμε.